Hello friends I know it has been quiet over here on the blog. It has been a really hard couple of weeks. I told you in a previous post that my sweet Scruffy was in congestive heart failure. The vet was optimistic in the beginning telling us that he could still live a couple of years if he responded well to the meds he was given.
At first all seemed better. He stopped the horrible coughing and still continued to eat. He didn’t act like he had a lot of energy. We stopped going on our long walks. He had a little trouble climbing the stairs. And then he stopped eating. After about four days of eating almost nothing except a few treats we took him back to the vet. They did more bloodwork. They found no issues with his kidneys or liver. They gave him a shot to settle his stomach. Another couple of days went by and he still would not eat. We were getting desperate. We decided to get a second opinion about the heart failure and everything that was going on with him.
I called University Of Tennessee Veterinary Hospital where Scruffy had gotten his cataracts removed years before. They had to have a referral from our local vet before they could schedule an appointment. I called our local vet and they sent a referral that day. UT called back to schedule the appointment. The first availability they had was September 27th. I was so upset and told them he might not be alive at that time. They told me they would put me on a cancellation list and if he got worse I could bring him through their ER but only during the hours of 5:00 Pm and 7:00 AM. So I had that option. In the meantime I messaged my niece who is a vet tech nearby. She told me the name of a veterinarian where she worked who also took care of her babies. She got me in with her the next day. She was wonderful with Scruffy and she confirmed the congestive heart failure and upped a couple of his meds. But she took the time to show me exactly on the ultrasound just what was going on. She didn’t like that he wasn’t eating and she gave us some food that could be given to him in a syringe. Force feeding him is actually what we were doing and I had a really big problem with it and he hated it. He could drink water and I knew he could eat if he wanted to. It was like he had given up. We only did that for a few days. He got weaker and weaker and his breathing was worse than ever.
On Tuesday evening he collapsed and just couldn’t get up. We knew it was time. We took him to the vet who had seen him last. It was very quick but the longest time of my life. He passed with his head on my arm with me whispering into his ear that he was soon going to see his big sister Molly and the kitties, Buster and Milo. Having to do this is the most horrible thing you can do for you but the most compassionate thing you can do for your fur baby. You have to be the strong one for them. Mark and I were a wreck and still are. For the last two weeks I have been an emotional mess worrying about Scruffy and not knowing what to do. In that respect not having to see him breathing rapidly, and not eating, and not being able to do all the things he could do before is a sad relief.
Scruffy was a rescue that I took in four and a half years ago. He had cataracts and a terrible skin condition. I knew the day I put him in my arms and he looked up at me and I looked down at him that he had my heart. We got the cataracts removed and the skin condition cleared up. But we couldn’t do anything about his heart giving out. He settled so perfectly into our family. Everywhere he went people loved him. I took him to the Assisted Living Village when my mother in law was there and we visited the rooms of many of the residents. They loved him and he loved them. He would go into their rooms and sit while they stroked his soft fur and talked baby talk to him. He was the center of our family in a quiet, non assuming, gentle way. He will simply never be forgotten.
I still hear him, and see him out of the corner of my eye. I feel him jump up on the bed at night, and hear his nails clicking on the floors. He followed me everywhere I went. I even joked that I was going to get one of those baby carriers and strap him onto me. When I had Covid a few weeks ago he stayed right beside me. He never left my side when I was at home.
So I wanted to share this with you. A way to get some of my feelings down and to let you know the reason behind the quiet time here on the blog. I am sad, lonely for my sweet boy and a so lost without him.
Fly high sweet boy you will never be forgotten.
Love your day your way!!!!